By Lauren Linhard – firstname.lastname@example.org
“Do you understand the words coming out of my mouth?”
Chances are they don’t, and when we’re being bad communicators, it’s generally our fault. I mean, what is your poor significant other supposed to do when they ask if something is wrong and you say, “No, I’m just tired,” but you mean, “I had the worst day ever, am doubting my abilities as a result and just want you to take the cuddle initiative to make me feel better. Oh, and wine, I want wine.”
But alas, our significant others aren’t mind readers and they’re going to take you at face value, as is the logical way of the world. Not that you’re ever feeling particularly logical at these moments. So, here is a friendly, totally loving reminder to “say what you want to say,” to quote the great Sara Bareilles. I promise, it will help with everyone’s sanity. And then you’ll get that wine!
Still don’t believe that your boo isn’t a mind reader? We asked five guys what they think their significant other meant when they said certain things:
Your girlfriend says, “I’m Fine.”
Steve C. – My response would probably depend on the situation. I imagine in most cases I would ask “Are you sure?”
Ian T. – Either she is fine or isn’t and doesn’t want to talk about it. It casts doubt in my mind. I guess my response would be to say okay and leave it at that.
Mark W. – Something’s wrong.
Rich L. – I would just continue the conversation.
Anthony V. – This always means she is not fine no matter what her excuse is. This annoys me because there is always clearly something wrong, and to me, if they are not telling you, they have something to hide or are just looking for attention.
They ask, “How does this outfit look?”
Steve C. – I will honestly praise how it looks on her, or I say I’m not a fan of the dress in the nicest way I can think of. My responses would probably be, “It looks great on you!” or, if I don’t like it, “If you like it, then it’s good.”
Ian T. – I see it as an honest question most of the time, unless they’re fishing for a compliment. I’d answer with my honest opinion, hoping they don’t take it in a negative light.
Mark W – It looks great!
Rich L. – I would tell her she looks beautiful and her butt looks good.
Anthony V. – I can’t respond if I don’t know how it looks.
They said, “You’re so cute.”
Steve C. – I get embarrassed, so I’d probably quickly say something along the lines of, “If you
say so” and move on with the conversation. If I’m lucky, my brain will come up with a compliment to say in return.
Ian T. – It would really depend on the context for this one. I’d say something like, “ha, thanks” in response.
Mark W. – You’re adorable.
Rich L. – Say thank you and fire a compliment back, although I’d rather hear I look handsome.
Anthony V. – In most circumstances, I find it to either be sarcasm or she wants something.
They shrug and say, “Of course it’s alright if you hang out with your ex.”
Steve C. – I haven’t dated anyone since high school and am shy as hell when it comes to relationships. In my case, my exes were never more than girls I was close friends with. So, I would probably just accept this phrase. If I had seriously dated that ex recently, I cannot imagine requesting to hangout with her.
Ian T. – I’d be like, “You sure?”. That response can be so layered in hidden meaning that I’d feel uneasy about it, but trust they are being honest.
Mark W. – Why would I want to do that?
Rich L. – The only ex I would want to hang out with, most of my girlfriends like more than me anyways, so I have no clue on that one.
Anthony V. – To me, this is also sarcasm. It’s a way for a women to try and make you feel uncomfortable so you don’t go, because 90 percent of the time she doesn’t have any reason to tell you u can’t.
She lets you know, “That guy was totally hitting on me.”
Steve C. – This is extremely weird and honestly obnoxious. I mean, why would you ever say something like this to a guy. I will almost always respond with something along the lines of “Good for him,” and then wonder why I am hanging out with this girl in the first place.
Ian T. – “Okay” would be my response. I mean, nothing I can do about it.
Mark W. – Did you hit back?
Rich L. – Probably just say something like – well obviously you’re smoking hot.
Anthony V. – It makes me feel really good because that totally means I have a good looking girlfriend and as long as they don’t touch they can look all they want.